god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize