Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I love having hate sex.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
