Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
