He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
