"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
