I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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