I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
