I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I'm too high and old for this...
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
i think we sleep fucked last night...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
