I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Randomize
