so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Randomize
