when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
it's like iHOP with fire
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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