your thong is hanging out like whoa
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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