The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
