do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
