I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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