i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
