My sheets look like a crime scene.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
