I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
