How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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