Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
