What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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