we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize