that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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