yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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