Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
