I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
