how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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