I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
