That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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