Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
