used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
