Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
