I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
