I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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