Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
