PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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