it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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