I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
