We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize