Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
