he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
