is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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