We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
