but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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