Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
