I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
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