No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
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