bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize