no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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