he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
