I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
