Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize