You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
